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Life isnt about finding yourself-Life is about creating yourself=Oscar Wilde



Oscar Wilde

Life is about both finding and creating yourself. Oscar Wilde specialized in the

paradoxical, the controversial, the contrasting as these became his social hallmarks. The

volumes of poems, proverbs and quotes contain a wealth and depth of wisdom that is

occasionally inconsistent with the actual experience of man.

The journey that man makes to find himself is a deeply spiritual one and was described

by Herman Hesse in the book Siddhartha in which he states ‘ the most important journey

a man will make is the journey to find him’. Life is therefore partly about finding you and

then creating on the person found. An alternative and interesting way to interpret this

particular statement would be to understand the timing and rates at which these different

processes occur. For example as the search commences so does the creation and the two

paths advance in an intertwining fashion, dependent on each other. This description more

accurately describes the spiritual journey of man.

It is important to remember that Oscar Wilde, as witty and smart as he was, lived during

the Victorian era and even though he was a social revolutionary he was still a product of

that era. This would explain the simplicity of the above statement in that the Victorians

had little comprehension of the internal spiritual journeys of for example Hindu mystics.

Life definitely is about creating yourself and choosing the path along which you will

walk. A question that is often asked is how does a man create his character. Part of the

answer lays in the fact that each individual is born with certain character traits and it is

upon these that the experiences of life mold the character. Of more importance than the

occurring event is the manner in which the man deals with the challenge. This result of

this interaction is actually the more defining element of character formation.

Surrounding yourself with challenging people and situations is more likely to motivate

you to a higher level of achievement. However the higher one goes the fewer individuals

can be found and at some point you will find yourself alone in a position of power having

achieved your goal while simultaneously building your character. People are generally

not born with the substance of character necessary for success in the modern world and it

is the gifts of hardship that imbue the traits associated with success. Tenacity, resilience,

determination and the absolute belief in self. Doubt creates a weakness that if not rapidly

neutered incorporates itself into the fabric of character. As the old adage goes ‘ power

perceived is power achieved’ and doubt will unquestionably be perceived as a weakness.

Some people never find their inner selves and will travel through the wrong avenues of

life finding nothing but disappointment. Peace and serenity constantly evade them

making their search decidedly more frantic. These troubled souls are usually some of the

early spiritual travellers and must go through several lifetimes before they begin to

approach self-realization. Their lack of spiritual depth is obvious to the seasoned traveller

and it is unusual for these individuals to be attracted to each other. Souls of a similar age

are immediately pulled towards each other and quite often continue their journey


The people we surround ourselves with are both a reflection and extension of our own

experiential essence as quite often are the places we inhabit. Every human has a unique

vibration that synchronizes with similar frequencies and when this happens it is

frequently described as a sense of ‘being connected’. This appreciation of the deeper

channels of communication allow the fortunate individuals to develop an understanding

more sophisticated than those made at more superficial levels. The vibration of other

people can change us for the better or worse depending on their frequency. This almost

invisible form of transformation is based on the hard science of quantum physics, which

also come very close to explaining the concept of consciousness. The creation, therefore,

of ourselves cannot occur in a vacuum and is without question the amalgamated result of

people, places and experiences.

The more that we create the easier it becomes to find. The analogy would be that of the

comparative ease of finding a skyscraper to the challenge of finding a single brick. Life

and its experiences allow the spirit to evolve which then searches for the self with greater

ease and efficiency. The interaction or points of spiritual friction are essential stepping-

stones towards enlightenment and each challenge that we are presented is actually an

opportunity for creation. It is from the ashes of war that great civilizations have raised

and it can be argued that had the total destruction of Germany not occurred after WW II

then Germany would probably not be the economic powerhouse it is today.

Loss, death, pain, = opportunity=growth=creation.

Throughout history nothing of importance has ever come from a place devoid of conflict.

The nature of battle encourages the development of character and perspective, two of the

most critical elements of creation. Without war it is very likely that man and technology

would have experienced a more stunted evolution. Violent bloodshed can only ever be

justified in the context of self-preservation and although a part of war has, in my opinion,

no creative value although I am sure there would be some counter arguments.

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